Ka like a wind

They already knew I was a vampire, but it felt like they were just finding out. I could taste their blood on my lips, even distinguish the flavors. The slightly greasy spice of Alistair’s blood – I guess all the pizza hadn’t worked its way out of his system yet. I could taste a cleaner copper tang of Eden’s blood, the thicker texture of Ashleigh’s. And the slightly sweet taste of Carrie on my lips.

That they’d all bled themselves for me was a gesture whose meaning I wouldn’t ever have been able to explain to them. After what they did for me, I couldn’t go on starving myself. Pushing myself to the point of collapse for fear of drinking blood would be an insult to their sacrifices and their love.

So I began to take, sparingly, from Carrie. It was hard for both of us, and I still didn’t enjoy it, but it seemed to ease some of the tension around me. Penny relaxed and no one had to worry about me falling over at the wrong moment.

I think it was a step closer for Carrie and I. We’d separated ourselves from the company so she could look ahead with her powers. Penny was taking advantage of the privacy, at Carrie’s suggestion, to teleport to her heart’s content. I know she’d been itching to be able to jump around like that for weeks. No kid should have to have that kind of self control. It made me smile to see her blinking around the woods, giggling and laughing. She doesn’t laugh enough.

Carrie took the chance to berate me for being over protective. But of her, not Penny. I was taking blood from her and I know what that does to a body and I wanted her resting afterwards, not seeking visions, no matter how important. We’d delayed coming out here for her to prophesize until today, but now I was getting an earful for it. And I guess I deserved it.

Carrie’s spent enough of her life being coddled. Hell, she had to be. But she was off the heroin, she was filling out and getting stronger. I couldn’t blame her for not wanting to be made to feel weak. I tried to explain that I couldn’t stand it if she collapsed or something because I’d drained her of blood and she insisted on running around. I guess that’s not fair, though. I’m not very good with apologies, but I tried.

“What’s keeping us from moving forward on this road?” She said after describing her vision. I could tell that she wasn’t talking about it, though. She was talking about us. There were a lot of reasons. Her break-up with Ashleigh was still only a little more than a month old. She was just twenty, and I was just tipping over forty, whether I looked it or not. And of course….we both knew I was going to die, and probably before Carrie could drink legally.

But even as that stuff went through my head, I had to admit that it wasn’t really keeping us apart. I tried to explain it to Penny as we walked back to camp. I wanted….needed…to be romantic for her. She’d had a damned hard life, and she deserved something good. She deserved to be treated with tenderness and passion. Carrie was always vague about her life after the prom but before being taken in by the Tet Corporation, but she probably lost her virginity in the back of some dealer’s car, putting out for a fix. Surrounded by anarchistic barbarians in a patched and dirty tent was not how I wanted to be with her for the first time.

Penny was sweet, she offered me candles she’d brought for her birthday cake. I got Carrie busy helping Penny set her tent up so I could hide hers. She saw what I was doing, it wasn’t like I could really hide it. Hell, everyone could see, even if they didn’t just know in the way we do about each other.

For a moment, I wondered what Ashleigh thought about it. We’d butted heads on more than one occasion, and I don’t think it was always about Penny. They hadn’t been apart that long, and it hadn’t been his idea to end it. He’d kissed her the first time we went through the thinny, something I was jealous of him for. Was he jealous of me now? Would he be suggesting some bare-knuckle sparring soon? I didn’t pick up on any resentment from him, but my telepathic abilities are next to non-existent.

Ashleigh wasn’t exactly in the front of my mind, though. I dug the bases of the candles into the dirt at the far end of the tent. They were meant for cakes, just tiny things, probably brightly colored, though I couldn’t tell. I lit them one by one and they started to melt right away. Carrie came in as I was lighting the last one. I snapped my zippo closed and looked at her. My face felt hot and it took me a while to realize I was blushing. I don’t blush a lot.

But when I looked at her face, Carrie was blushing too. I could only imagine the rosy color, but I could see her pale cheeks flushing and her large, dark eyes were wide. She looked over the tent, saw the tiny candles glowing, our bedrolls laid out one on top of the other to make a more comfortable bed. I was embarrassed, but by the look in her eyes I’d have almost sworn she was seeing the scene I’d imagined laying for her. A silk sheets and rose petals.

The build up was coming on quickly, a mounting tension that we were no longer trying to resist. I knew then what Roland must have felt when he first took Susan into his arms. Ka like a wind. At that point, if the tank had come roaring towards us, I don’t think it could have stopped us.

I pulled her into my arms and we fell into the blankets, kissing, exploring. She arched her back, pressing her breasts into my hands. Her legs wrapped around me. I tangled my fingers in her long, dark hair, my mouth on hers, on her neck. When I finally entered her, it was with a deep sigh, matched by Carrie. An exhalation of satisfaction, of completion. It left us pleasantly drained and exhausted. We were still surrounded by enemies, heading towards a bloody battle, and a trap beyond that, but it seemed like things were actually going right.

Ka. Love.